Don't Be Dependent On a Man

Ladies, don't be dependant on a man. Don't ever lose your independence. Once you lose it, you will slowly lose yourself.

I moved to a new state where I didn't know anybody. I quit working and became a housewife. Mistake one and two. I have no friends locally. My job skills are eroding. I have more debt than savings. If my husband left me today, I would have nothing.

I gave up my independence to be a housewife, but was it worth it? I was promised to be taken care of, but for how long? I wake up every day waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under me. I can quickly go from wife to homeless and unemployed in a minute.

Being married doesn't mean you have to lose yourself. Marriage should be about blending two lives into one, not taking one away. If you become dependant on a man, you are guaranteed nothing. The minute he walks, you lose.

Some women may like being dependant on a man. That's great if you're married to a millionaire, but if you're middle class, living paycheck to paycheck, being dependant on a man is a different story. A scary story.

If you are ever dependant on a man for whatever reason, never lose your friends and always keep up your skills. No man is worth losing that. By becoming dependant on someone else, you isolate yourself from the outside world and that world can become a boring and lonely place. The longer you are isolated, the harder it is to break free. I know when I go back to work my skills will be behind and I will have to start at the bottom and work my way up. In some ways I regret becoming a housewife. Some people think I'm lucky, but at what cost?

Being dependant on someone is not worth it. You lose more than you gain. More importantly, you lose yourself. The only person you should be dependant on is you. At least when you let yourself down you have no one to blame but yourself. The best part is you can pull yourself back up. You have your own back and that's the way it should be.

Isn't that how little girls are raised? To be independent. Then how come so many of us are concerned about what the guy does for a living and how much he makes? Are we only independent until marriage? After marriage are we dependant on our husbands and our paychecks become shopping money?

My income depends on someone else. That's a lot of pressure to support someone else. Sometimes I feel guilty by not contributing financially. I miss getting a paycheck that was all my own. I miss having an identity that wasn't tied to someone else's existence.

I took a gamble and became a housewife. I thought I'd won but in the end I'll probably lose. I don't blame my husband, I made this choice. I am too far down this road to turn back, but if I had to do it all over again I would definitely choose me over him.