A Modern Day Housewife

Yes, I am a housewife, and no, I do not have kids. When people ask me if I work and I say no, the next question is always do I have kids. The answer is also no. Usually when I answer the second part of the question you would have thought I was speaking a foreign language. People tilt their heads and scrunch up their faces. The next reaction is usually silence or a polite response. I can actually see people try to process this idea in their heads. It seems as though a housewife is an extinct creature. One you only see in the movies but didn't know they actually existed in real life.

I get that housewives are rare and little girls no longer grow up wanting to play homemaker. I am a housewife by choice, and no, I do not sit around and watch TV all day eating bon bons.  I may not get dressed up and work in an office, but I have plenty of things to do.

There are downsides to being a housewife. One is people know I'm home all the time and assume I have nothing to do. This makes it hard to turn down unwanted invites. How do you tell someone you would rather stay home then go to their event?  I can't be sick all the time.

Another downside is boredom and loneliness. I am alone for most of the day. I can always find things to do. There is always something that needs cleaning and it seems the dishes and laundry are never done. The one thing I don't have is a lifeline. Social networking and email help fill the void temporarily but only if I choose to participate. I can talk to my cat but it's pretty much a one-sided conversation. TV fills the void at night until my husband comes home from work with stories about his day. My day, on the other hand, is not so interesting.

Don't assume that since I'm a housewife that I'm rich and can afford to stay at home. My husband and I make sacrifices constantly. For us going out to eat is a treat and not a weekly event.  We do not go on lavish vacations. I buy generic, clip coupons, and look for things on sale. We sacrifice for this kind of lifestyle. It is a choice. The extra money I could bring in working would help, but then due to my husband's work schedule we would not see each other very much. We sacrifice the extra money for time together and time is one thing a paycheck can't buy.

Being a housewife does not mean I have thrown my career ambitions out the door. One day I will go back to work. One day I will probably have to go back to work. I have a college degree and hope to one day have some sort of meaningful career. But for now I am a housewife and I rather do that then work some job I hate.

Being a housewife is work. I work on my home and my paycheck comes from my husband. I can't call in sick or work overtime. I'm really no different than a working woman. I just don't "work" and I don't have kids.  My home is my office and, in some ways, my husband is my boss.

Being a housewife is not as glamorous as you see on TV. I actually do not know any other housewives without kids. I do know a few stay at home moms but from what I see their lives are not very glamorous either. I do not dress up everyday, sometimes I don't even wash my hair or put on make-up. Trust me, no one wants to see that on TV, not even me.

It seems that staying home with kids is more socially acceptable. If you have kids then you must be busy. This is not to say that one day I don't hope to transition from housewife to stay at home mom. This is one of the reasons I am a housewife. But until that time comes, yes, I am a housewife, and, no, I do not have kids.