I'm Lonely

I'm lonely.  It has taken me nearly a year to figure this out. Before the baby was born my husband and I did a lot together - shopping, eating out, watching movies. That all changed with the baby. Now I stay home with the baby (constantly) and my husband goes out. He's taken over all the errands like grocery shopping plus his busy social life which rarely includes me. We have family time when he has time for it. Meanwhile I sit here. My husband and I have talked about me getting out of the house more. We've talked about it more than once but the actual getting out of the house part never seems to happen. I have to tie my husband to the chair to take a shower.

I had a baby and lost my best friend. I have no other friends here. I miss my parents because I don't have family here. I even miss my hometown (even though it's changed) because I feel no connection here. I'm in a prison of my own making. I'm lonely and it hurts. I thought having a baby would bring us closer together but instead we're further apart. I thought couple time would be replaced with family time but we've just gone in different directions passing the baby off like a football. I honestly don't know what to do or where to go. I've thought about talking to someone but I can't seem to pick up the phone and make an appointment. I'm stuck in the house with no place to go while my husband can't seem to sit still. We live completely different lives. I didn't realize being a stay at home mom would be so lonely.