To Be In the Dark or Not

Sometimes I wonder whether it's better to be in the dark or know the truth. If you live in the dark you're oblivious to what's really going on around you. You walk around blissfully happy but if you know the truth what really can you about it anyways. You can scream and cry but that won't change anything. It is what it is. Is it better to know or not to know?

Sometimes being in the dark isn't a bad thing. Sometimes it's better not to know than to know especially when you can't change your situation. There are some things you can't change or stop no matter how hard you try. If someone is going to cheat on you or if an alcoholic is going to drink, you may not be able to stop them no matter what. It's going to happen and you're going to hurt. Then ask yourself do you really want to know.

Now if the truth is obvious then you must confront it. If it's obvious someone is cheating on you, then you must talk about it. If it's obvious someone is drinking too much, then you must confront it. Confronting the problem head on doesn't mean things will change. If they do change it doesn't mean it's always for the best. Things could get worse, stay the same, or get better. Just because you confront the truth doesn't change it. It is what it is. It's up to you to make the next move.

You can't change the truth and you can't run and hide from it. Sometimes it's better not to know. To go on living like everything is fine until it's impossible not to do so. Whether you know it or not, the outcome is still the same. You may choose to stay living with an alcoholic or a cheating spouse. You may act like everything is fine. You may forgive but the hurt is still there. Whether you know the truth or not, whether you stay or go, the hurt and pain remains. The damage is done.

Which is why I think I want to live in the dark for as long as possible. It's safe there, sometimes even comforting. When the light comes on, it will come on. I can't stop it. The I will know what the truth is. The pain will begin and I will have to make a choice and life will go on. But for now I just want to stay in the dark and hold on tight. It is always darkest before the dawn.