Back to My Roots

I'm tired of faking it. I'm tired of not being me both physically and emotionally. I'm even slowly going back to my natural hair color. The bubbly blond was someone else. I don't know her anymore. I don't want to fake it. I want to know the real me.

I feel darker. Darker like the roots on my head. I've gone from being optimistic to realistic as I get older. Not so much pessimistic but real. I can't even watch fiction on TV anymore because I know it's not real. It's a made up story with made up people. If I want fiction I'll read a book. I like things to be honest and natural. From my hair color, to TV shows, to people, I don't have time for games. If you want to play a game, I'll call you out. Don't mess with me. I'm not faking it and I'm not taking it anymore. Watch out world, I'm done faking it. I'm older, wiser and darker. I see the world for what it really is.

Tomorrow is no guarantee. We must live for today. Life is too short not to. There will be heartache and pain and hopefully some happiness. People come and go, so do jobs and money. It's all fluid. It's not really yours to begin with. We're all on a journey and wherever you are it's just a pit stop, not your final destination. There's no times for lies. The time is now. Stop faking it and start getting real. Get to know yourself first. You will be more powerful and secure. You come first. No one is going to take care of you better than you can. What you have today may be gone tomorrow. Get to know yourself and figure out your life. Once you do that the picture will become clearer. The clouds will part and you will see the sun. You will see things for how they really are and not what they should be and in that moment you will get a glimpse of the real you.