Fighting the Tide

I'm tired of fighting the tide and going against myself. Life is easier when you try to be yourself and not someone else. In the end, that's all you can be is yourself. That's all we got.

I'm tired of trying to impress people and be their friend. I'm tired of being nice and trying to be involved in other people's lives. I'm tired of trying to fit in where I'm obviously not welcomed. People either like you or they don't. You can't force friendship or love. It's there or it's not. Don't try to fight it. Accept it and move on. Easier said than done but for your own sanity and happiness you must move on.

I consider myself to be a nice person. I'm not mean or evil. I'm not the life of the party but I do like to laugh and have fun once in a while. I have a cell phone, email, and an online profile. If anyone wants to contact me they can. If they're nice, I'll gladly respond, it's that simple. I'm here waiting. If anyone wants to talk they can find me.  I'm tired of always trying and reaching out and being rejected.

I wish I was more popular. I wish I had more friends. I wish I was more talkative but I'm not. I can try to change those things but I still want to remain true to myself.

I think a lot of this comes with age. I like myself more. I spend more time trying to learn about me than anyone or anything else in my life. I finally realize it's easier to be me. I've stopped fighting myself. I'm not perfect and I never will be. I've accepted that. I'm me. I'm done trying to impress people and trying to be a friend to someone who's not interested. I have to be my own best friend. I rather have no friends than ten friends who stab me in the back. It's just not worth it.

True friendships and love are hard to find. Everyone's searching for it. We are human and are not perfect. We won't get along with everybody and even the people we love or like can get hurt along the way. At the end of the day, you have to be happy with yourself. You have to like yourself and know that no matter what others think about you, that you are a loving and caring person and you deserve to be happy.